By: ledouxdujour

Jan 31 2018

Tags: , , , ,

Category: New Orleans, That's Life

Leave a comment

Focal Length:2.18mm
Shutter:1/0 sec
Camera:iPhone 5

My heart is a balloon. My mind is a sleepless transistor radio. My eyes glow like infant moons, my soul murmurs and my memory leaks. Sometimes I wake up and say your name out loud. To make sure you are still there. Don’t take it the wrong way. I know you will always be with me.
The smell of industrial disinfectant, stale toilets and feet. They made me sleep in my shoes. In the morning, he opened his hands and there was a rainbow of pills. Said they was gonna lock him up for popping his brother. The biscuit wasn’t supposed to go off like that. He’d finish himself after they indicted him.
I think you’ve got to go and check it out, my grandma said. And that was all that needed to be said. The refrigerators lining the streets, entombed in layers of duct tape like wordless victims bound and gagged, on display as the plastic martyrs of the floodwaters. The sound of flies heavy in the air. Humvees and National Guard and M-16s. Decay in a state of acceleration. Curfew parties where the sun went down and martial law shut us up inside the creole cottages and we drank until we could no longer see the wreckage and made all sorts of bad guesses playing in that hot traffic. The feeling in the air damp and heavy, it seemed to weigh on you. It seemed like breathing took more effort and sometimes you forgot. You could almost drown in the damp.
Tears on the public transit. Suitcase in a homeless shelter. Confessing my sins to a dog. Confiscated meds and obfuscating anti-depressant withdrawal confusion and invisible contusions lining my insides. That there might be love yet in the world for somebody like me. To let it bloom within this silly hollow machine.